Today, I have found myself out of sorts. I have not been able to concentrate and it has been very hard for me to focus enough to pray. Each time I begin to pray, my mind begins to wander and so does my prayer. I will be praying a “Hail Mary” then I catch myself repeating the same verse over and not be able to remember what goes next…”Hail Mary full of grace, Hallowed be thy Name, thy Kingdom come, thy will be done, as it is heaven”…see I can’t even type it. This is what my mind has been doing all day.
I’ve been sitting here in front of my computer screen for awhile, knowing that earlier today I had a clue what I was writing about and now it has left me. However, as I began to write, it hit me….I am not the only one whose mind gets so wound up in solving problems, setting schedules, dealing with relationships, etc.. that their mind gets distracted and prayer becomes one less thing they can’t or wont do.
I admit my “Hail Mary” could use some work but it hasn’t kept my from trying to get it right. A year or so ago, however, I would have just given up and not bothered until I was too far into a problem and then realized that I may need more help than human hands could give. I do believe, that is how God reminds us that we have begun to stray–It’s Get Real Time. Starts off with gentle reminders, then maybe some close calls, then if that doesn’t work He brings on the real stuff.
I know I have lost my path more than once and I also know what has gotten me “back on path” and it hasn’t always been good. It really just comes down to prioritizing. Today, I realized that even though I kept messing up my “Hail Mary”, I kept trying. I figure maybe I don’t have together today, so for sure I don’t want to go it alone. I know that Our Father is watching and He is not looking for perfection (He need only look in the mirror for that) He is just looking for trust, faith, love, and hope; all of those HE is willing to give to us with an unmatched generosity. So if you find yourself like me, don’t give up or go at it alone, just keep trying, for God is there… you may not feel Him, right there and then, but He is there. Let go of the world and let God.
Help us Lord this world can get a bit to hectic and our minds sometimes are not strong enough to keep going. Please help us to remember that you have given us the most perfect ways to “meditate” and “clear” our minds and souls. We need only make the time for a rosary, allowing ourselves to get lost in the words, give them life and we will soon be back to who you made us to be.